"One, Two, Three: Floating in the Air"

The entirety of summer passed by without me making a new post, which is a sign that I ought to be more diligent in making regular updates instead of just focusing on big projects. I have another interview I did last month which I’m currently transcribing, so I anticipate that’ll be the next post I make here! Until then I figure an update would be fitting since I haven’t posted since uploading the interview at the end of June. 

Most of my academic year went by without much inconvenience, although the weeks leading up to the final exams were particularly hectic. It was a weird kind of tranquillity: like the irregular routine established was enough for me to find comfort in. Outside of studies: I got around to playing Triangle Strategy when it released towards the start of the year, which I THOROUGHLY enjoyed thanks to brutal difficulty. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so triumphant upon completing a game before! I also finally got around to playing Fire Emblem Echoes after getting the collectors edition of the game back in 2018. A series of inconvenient events and timings held me back from playing it for those four years, but I appreciated finally being able to experience it.

Yet somehow: I still have the Revelations path of Fire Emblem Fates to finish. Crazy to think Fire Emblem Fates of all games has lasted me longer than any other game I’ve played. 

A lot happened this summer. I went to Morocco with my friends from uni, which was the first time I’d been on holiday in 7 years. The main joy of this visit was trying out all the (insanely well-priced) food from restaurants and stalls in the marketplaces. I barely had much wifi access during that week, so it was a welcome break from everything going on back home as I was able to just enjoy good company in a wonderful place. It was the first time I’d seen my university friends so relaxed too, as they’d spent most of the academic year focusing entirely on studies. Most of the memories I have of the visit are of spontaneous jokes and discussions made whilst visiting so many new places there, as well as the countless moments of relief I felt every time I saw a stall selling refrigerated orange-flavoured drinks. 

I also visited France. My time spent there was tranquil, like a much-needed escape from the noise of busyness back home. The week I spent there gave me a renewed appreciation for my life, as well as for myself. I didn’t feel as bogged down by solitary experiences afterwards: I saw a part of myself I wasn’t able to see before, and I feel lighter and happier because of it. I’ll cherish the lessons I learnt and the memories I forged there. 

Towards the end of the summer, I also went on a weekend residential with a friend from uni. This experience was particularly meaningful and valuable simply because of the social environment that was present there: it feels like destiny that I attended the residential a few weeks after going to France because both those experiences helped me feel more and more like myself. I met new people, made new connections, and I felt more at ease with life in general. I guess it’s safe to say this has been the most productive summer holiday of my life? It was just full of adapting to new environments I’d never been in before, and I found it more rewarding than I ever anticipated it to be. 

In truth: half of this post had been written a few weeks ago. I chose to return to it today because I wanted to get back in touch with my writing pursuits as soon as possible after the events of the past week. I still have my interviews which I’m so grateful to have the opportunities to conduct and write up, but they take a lot of time to put together. I want to make blog updates more regular because I feel I’d be doing a disservice to myself if I didn’t. 

I’m wrestling with simple feelings in an unfamiliar context, right now. I feel a sense of clarity in the way to move forward, but there’s a nagging weight that manifests and vanishes at the turn of stream of consciousness. I don’t want to stagnate and wallow in confusion, though. I feel a motivation to maintain the momentum of the summer. I can adapt to wherever it takes me, I pray. 

Outside of that: second year of uni is going steady. It’ll be a rewarding year if it continues at this rate. 

As of right now: I’ve picked up from where I left Yakuza 3 and Lost Judgement last year, having only put a few hours into both. I want to make the time to continue with them because right now I feel like stories of conviction and strength are what I enjoy the most right now. 

Conviction. I’ll let myself be carried by conviction.